Emma

Dear Emma,

My sweet girl, we didn’t have many years together, but I feel like you’ve been mine forever. You were an old soul, with an enormous personality and clever disposition.

I remember when we decided we wanted another puppy. We thought your brother Bae would like to have a doggie friend and so we contacted his breeder. Come to find out Bae’s parents were expecting you! Bae would have a full sibling! We knew we wanted you, a black tri, even before you were born. I remember the day you were born. I remember seeing your pictures for the first time. You were so beautiful Emma. I named you after Emma Swan from Once Upon a Time. It seemed fitting for Bae.

When we brought you home, you were a ball of fire. You never ran out of energy. You and Bae played for hours and could never stop. You loved to snuggle. And you always found ways to sneak up onto furniture to be with us. Those big brown eyes got their way all the time.

I remember when you got fixed, and how sad you looked the whole way home. I remember how sad you’d be when we had to put you in your crate, and how you’d whine and beg to be let out. I remember how you used to climb everything! We’d always find you on top of the table in the backyard. You loved to sleep on the stepper or under the coffee table. Or with your brother in the giant doggie bed with bought you both for Christmas.

I’m going to miss you Emma. I miss your smile. Your big, goofy smile. I miss your floppy ears and your wet nose. I miss the way you tried to sit on everyone’s feet. I miss the way you’d sit on Bae’s face to get the bone out of his mouth. I miss the sound of your feet, pitter pattering around the house. I miss how excited you’d get to go on a walk. You could barely contain yourself, wiggling and whining the whole time I put your harness on. I miss how much you loved Aramis and Tristan. How you’d always try to sneak into their beds at night. I miss how you’d follow me around everywhere, even to the bathroom. I miss seeing your face in the window, waiting for me to come inside. I miss your funny "butt-skirt" and how it waved as your butt wiggled in excitement.

Emma, sometimes we have to do things we don’t want to. This was never something I thought I’d have to do. I wanted to be your mom forever. I wanted to watch you grow up. I wanted to be. There for you when you finally were ready to go.

I hope you always remember how much I love you. When I put you and Bae into the car of the volunteer who came to take you away, I fell apart. I stood there, watching you drive away. When I got back into the house, I sat down and sobbed. “What have I done?” I cried. Sometimes, things are out of our control and I knew you deserved something better than I could give you. Emma you deserve a huge yard with plenty of space to run. I hope you find a family to take you on walks every day and sneak you treats. It’s my wish that you and Bae can be together. I really do hope a family will take you both so you don’t have to be apart.

Emma, I love you. I will always love you. Please remember that my sweet girl. I will hold you in my heart forever.

Your mom